Just a place for random rantings and ravings.....

Wednesday, July 26, 2006


Those of you tuning in get a 2 for 1 today!

I had a conversation last week with a good friend of mine and the issue of pickiness came up. "Am I too hard to please?" she asked. That is one difficult question for me to answer, mainly because each of us is picky about something- whether it's food or music or ties. Me personally, I have certain things that bug me (which you'll soon read) but I'd like to believe I'm less particular than most people. My reply to her was that she WAS in fact picky about certain things, but generally I wouldn't put her in a catagory with people who are demanding about A LOT of things. That conversation has got me thinking- and you KNOW that's dangerous. What is it that makes a person "picky"? That of course begs the question, Am I too picky? I remeber a date I had a few years ago where the woman had me driving my hungry ass to five different restaurants before we stopped because she wasn't happy with the places I chose. If I was any less of a gentleman, I would've left her punk ass at restaurant #3 and went home, but my mama taught me better than that. That simple but effective act would have made this story SO much better, but needless to say, I didn't talk to her much after that....

Is the root of pickyness a matter of preference? Say, preferring more expensive name brand clothing over cheaper run of the mill digs or preferring sneakers over boots?

Is pickyness learned behavior? For example, if you got whoopins everytime you forgot to clean your room as a youngin', you learned quickly to keep your drawls (or drawers) off the floor to avoid a good beating.

Is it an innate reaction to things that alarm our brains- a sort of ancient instinctual brain fart genetically passed down from the caveman days? We ALL know people who run for their lives screaming bloody murder whenever they see ANY tiny animal with six legs or more. I'm sure if West Nile carrying mosquitos were 8 inches long instead of a few millimeters, I'd be running for cover too!


Is it a matter of choice? Do people actually make a conscious decision to be anal retentive to prove a point? I remember another date where the girl I was with (and her 2 friends) fussed at the Japanese waitress at the downtown Benihana's for the ENTIRE MEAL because we weren't brought warm towels when we sat down- something the women experienced in the posh Buckhead area of Atlanta. This may sound too ridiculous to be true, but I assure you it happened.

I'd like to be fair and share my own personal quirks rather than psychologize someone else's. I can't address another person's pickyness without judging my own right?.... I'll even break them down by category to make it more concise:

I don't like when they toss in the title of the movie in the dialogue at the end of the movie for dramatic effect. For example, Tom Cruise saying, "I am the last samurai..." at the end of The Last Samurai- virtually ruined the whole action packed film that I liked until that point.

I don't like the fact that just about any "American" restaurant you go to serves virtually the same items- burgers, chicken sanwiches, fajitas and wings. If I had my way, all chain restaurants like Ruby Tuesdays, Chili's and TGIFriday's would close up shop for eternity and be replaced by individual restaurants serving individual food items. I realize that it's impossible to have 2 million different food choices- but dammit a man can dream right?

When I was about 7, I wanted to be Jewish- so much so that I asked my mom how to become Jewish. She told me I could convert but it wouldn't be easy and this was before I met anyone who was Jewish or knew what the hell Jews did. In fact, I met Jordan when I was in the 7th grade and he was the first Jewish person I had ever met. We rode the school bus together (#18 baby!) and I saw him virtually everyday for two years before I even found out he was Jewish. I just liked the sound of the word. I suppose that just shows how much I value religion.....

AW HELL!!!! This would normally be a long blog of it's own, but I don't want to sound like a whiny little biyatch so I'll keep it short and sweet. I think free/shared/stolen downloads are the greatest things to happen to music since the vinyl record. I applaud anything that reiterates how shitty the music has been from major record companies and it's about time listeners started taking their tunes by force (just don't get caught!). Oh yeah, techno and Christian Rock are both pretty bad too....

Porn (I couldn't resist!):
I don't like porn that looks like it was made in a studio with an expensive set, make-up artists and a string of fluffers (look it up!). I prefer the gritty stuff that looks like a camera crew busted in on some random couple in the midst of their love making. The more authentic it appears, the better. Can someone explain why they STILL put dialogue in porn? I can see why they wanted the porn industry to seem legit in the 70's, but these days there is no excuse!

I don't like people who complain too much. Life is too short to spend it bitching about how much better you wish it could be. So with that, I'm gonna end it here and let you decide for yourself I'm too picky.

By the way, I have a special request. If you're reading this, please include one or two of your personal quirks in the comment section (including you Nicky!). If you're uncomfortable with strangers knowing your business, log in as anonymous- not like anyone would know who you are anyway. Gotta love the net! Oh yeah- insanely random bouts of curiosity is another quirk of seem to have.....I hope you don't mind.


Blogger Rock said...

paz y amor, again I am struck by your wonderful site. I am picky about salespeople concentrating on their customer instead of having a conversation with their friends in the store. I am picky about people holding up lines by long-winded requests, without thinking of the people behind them. I'm very picky about fast food restaurants advertising healhty salads, which turn out to have as much or more calories and saturated fats as the regular meals.

Anyway, I wish I had more time to read in detail more blogs. There are so many of them out there, like yours, that are worth spending time in.


Thu Jul 27, 03:09:00 PM

Blogger Rock said...

See, I shoud edit before I send. I meant to say, I am picky about salespeople having conversations with their friends instead of concentrating on the customer.



Thu Jul 27, 03:11:00 PM

Anonymous micki said...

Good Blog! Pickyness is somewhat arbitrary, and at the same time learned. For instance: there is a huge difference between being spoiled and spoiled-rotten;due to the position of birth,I am spoiled (hence my pickyness-I like most things to go my way;I can accept it when & if they don't); drives me crazy to hear small children disrespect ANYBODY, especially a parent;I don't appreciate being spoken to by a male as though he was talking to a cheap whore. Am I Picky? HELL TO THE YEAH! Thanks & keep writing. Love you, micki

Fri Jul 28, 07:41:00 AM

Blogger Kiyotoe said...

Well my brotha, although i'm sure you know must of my little quirks i will humor you. (By the way, you may have left some stuff out of your own confessions of pickiness, but that's not my place). #1 i can't stand when people bring their little babies to the movies ESPECIALLY if it's a horror or otherwise violent flick.
#2 i cannot take it when my mother haggles for lower prices when we're shopping together (that's one of those childhood ones u mentioned).
#3 i hate it when this happens: "hey, i gotta tell you something. Naaaah, i better not. Nevermind."
Whew, talk about cruisin' for a bruisin'.

Fri Jul 28, 08:40:00 AM

Anonymous micki said...

Originally, I was coming back to share;then I run across Kioyote's addition: you know I love you, but I must say, the haggling MOM? while I know it frustrates to no end, look at the benefits her haggling afforded you;you know most of what I speak. 'Enuff said. Paz, that was quite gentleManly of you, riding the "date" around ad nausea: #1 possibly, did the inconvenience work to your advantage at any point? #2 did you learn anyhing? #3 would you say our strengths often work as a double-edged sword to our weaknesses? Ciao.

Fri Jul 28, 09:36:00 AM

Blogger paz y amor said...

Hmm....Micki, I would say I learned a bit about myself that day. #1 I would say that the one thing that worked in my favor that day was that I knew I'd be in for A LOT more BS if I continued to date that woman. #2 I learned that I had a lot more patience than I previously thought. #3 That very same patience (a strength) is a double edged sword in that some people will push you as far as they can assuming it's weakness. When you finally say "Kiss my ass!" they look at you like they did nothing wrong. The funny thing about that situation is that after I decided to kick her to the curb, she kept calling me because she was used to having the control and dropping men first. So when I stopped being nice to her, telling her exactly why I didn't want to be around her anymore, she was 'offended' (????) not acknowledging that she had a hand in it.

Fri Jul 28, 11:36:00 AM

Anonymous igor said...

hi, paz a amor, is it ok to answer your questions here ?

1. What was it about your experience during your stint in the Russian army that caused you to dislike Central Asian Muslims?

not easy to answer in few words, eh? well, may be I can put it this way: there are times when a man is put into situation when he has to achieve a particular task whatever are the costs to him. And they always demonstrated outstanding ability to ... mmm ... dodge the responsibility. Even a simple task - get rid of snow in -45C windy weather, you come back, nothing is done, they all crowded around the fire, you ask "what the fuck?", they look at you with their innocent hazel eyes and answer "it's too cold to work"... why, yes, of course, it's too cold.

2. Aside from Islam, do you think Arabs and Central Asian Muslims are in the same ethnic group?

I'd be suprised if they are. But the general opinion of the veterans of Afgan War, and of ex-military advisors to Syria/Egypt I served with, was: "Ah, they are of the same kind..."

"our" *stan muslims are a meek variant of oasis arabs , persians are tougher than oasis arabs , and afgans are most ferocious of them all.

and all of them are lousy warriors in european understanding of what a "noble" fight is: face-to-face, looser admits defeat, etc...

but they are unbeatable guerillas. I'd stop here.

I repeat - it's mostly borrowed opinion.

3. If so, would they be in the same ethnic group as European Muslims (Chechens, Albanians, Bosnians etc)?

Are you trying to hint to me that all peoples are different and there is no such thing as "general muslim"? I know! So what?

If I hypothetically told you that I was a Muslim, would that change your opinion of me?

sorry, I don't have an opinion of you. I learned long ago one is better not to develop an opinion about a person after, say, exchanging several messages or scrolling down his blog...


you know, thinking again, I should admit that whenever I utter: "muslims" I don't mean "muslim people" ("people" like in "persons"), I do mean "muslim culture", "muslim civilisation", common behavioral patterns and rituals, etc... on the other hand ...

ok, i should think about it and find more proper expression to convey my thoughts without ambiguity and misunderstanding.

Fri Jul 28, 09:10:00 PM

Blogger Counselor said...

Wow...seems like I had a similar conversation with a good friend about the very same topic...things that make you go hmmm....LOL

Anyway, I think there is a thin line between being picky and obnoxious--each day I try to keep my balance...

Here are a few things that bother me...

-people who keep hitting the elevator button once it's already lit (what are you doing? Making the elevator go quicker?)

-people who curse in the presence of elderly people (it's soooo disrespectful...who care's how old you are)

-parents who ignore the behavior of their children WHEN THEY KNOW THEY'RE BUGGING THE HELL OUT OF OTHERS.... (it's just not right...)

-people who mumble drive me crazy! Make a choice. Either you want to speak and be heard or not. Besides, it turns me into a liar. After two times, I pretend like I heard what you've said--and I begin to ignore everything else you say in the future...why can't we get along??!!

fun blog...

Sat Jul 29, 11:01:00 PM

Anonymous igor said...

er, paz a amor, I suggest you may delete my comment now, as you have read it already - I don't want to bring alien topic in here...

Sun Jul 30, 12:07:00 AM

Blogger Woozie said...

I never understood dialogue in porn. I don't think anyone does.

Mon Jul 31, 05:45:00 PM

Blogger Raspootin said...

Dirty Bathrooms
Lazy Minds

And Biggest one: people who chew with mouth open then make a jaw clicking sound: then scrape their eating utensil on the plate as they repeat the process.

Mon Jul 31, 07:53:00 PM


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